~Oppressiveness of Morals~

So I have been doing a lot of mind numbing searching lately. I have been trying to find people that I can can connect to that have similar beliefs to mine. I could list a million things I am against, yet at the same point and time I am not for being a dictator in someones life. Especially in their personal life. Where they choose to be spiritual, or have beliefs in something greater than humanity and life here on earth.

Truth is No matter how hard I search to find the right to live by morals I will never be able to look at morals as anything more than something for me to live by, not something to be forced upon others. Lots of people shout out about their logic and reasoning and their sense of emotions attached to a certain subject, and wanting to force these things onto others.

It is very simple for me, If you want to be a vegan that is fine, be a vegan. Leave my right to eat what I want to alone though.

Really until it comes to the point of harming others I don't care what you do. What you worship, what you bow too. Or until it comes to causing stress in my life.

You know I understand believing in God. I truly do, my choice to not bow to one of the 3000 gods in the universe that is worshiped is that of my own. It is through my own logic and reasoning that if there is a god it will not have any human traits or emotions,and it certainly is not something that could be even described by the human mind.

I find it humorous, that Muslims, Christians, and Jews all bow to the same deity, yet they all see it that they were either lucky enough to be born in to the right religion, following the right book, and know very little about their own holy books let alone each others holy books. I find it even more humorous at how many different forms and branches of the religions there are. The doctrine that these religions follow, some follow the book half way, some change their books completely to say something that it doesn't even come close to.. But none of the follow it to a T..

The other thing that I find funny is how quick one group is to call another group evil yet they are following the same thing? Then you venture out into the world to discover not hundreds but thousands of other religions, and gods, and goddesses. And to me it only makes sense to say how the hell am I supposed to know which one is right? Because with all these gods and goddesses, and religions there are off shoots that make the gods and goddesses have different human traits and emotions. At the end of the day the only thing they all have in common, is they will swear to you that they are all right, and the only way in to the kingdom of god.

So from an outside point of view, you have to ask how can any of them be right? Maybe all of them are right? Maybe all of them have parts of it right? But what is right? What is wrong? Maybe at the end of the day it is not about being right, but just accepting what is right for you and moving along, with out forcing your opinions and morals on to others. Because when you force them on to others and try and make them see things the way you do, are you not being oppressive? Forcing morals that are an individuals own thoughts and reasoning is as oppressive as telling them they can't possibly love at the end of the day, because love is not real.. But maybe what is real to one person doesn't need to be real to anyone else. However why is it that us humans need someone else to agree with us, for us to be validated? Why? so that we can be oppressive in our morals because of course the more people who agree with you the more you seem to feel that you are right.

It is not a validation, it is just an oppressive way to push your ideas and morals onto another at the end of the day..

and thanks for reading my ramblings.

~The afterlife~

~The afterlife~
This is a subject that all creationist that I speak with have so much to say about. They live their life here, so surrounded by the thoughts of how to get to heaven, and how to make their lives right with their chosen god; that they forget to live their life.

Often times as they convert, it because a never-ending circle of trying to convert others and loved ones so that we may all be joined together in eternal bliss with one another.

Can I prove that there is not an afterlife? The answer is NO. However the afterlife being anything like any organized religion describes is very much so unlikely by everything in which we know by science now.

The afterlife is nothing more than a propaganda that tells you, it is ok to mess up here, hurt others, and not pay attention to your thought patterns because in the afterlife you will be rewarded for doing so. I have thought this out through and through, and this is the conclusion that I have come to. If by chance there is an Omnipresence that we know as god~ and we will be joined together with it in the end~ I truly want no part of it.

The ones I know who follow these books, are by far some of the most hostile, narcissistic human beings that I know. Wanting you to indulge in their beliefs, and lay aside your own.

I am not as well versed in science as most of my fellow atheists are, however I am very well versed in Religion, Christianity being one of the top on my list, for every verse most Christians can spew I can spout out 10 more explaining why they are acting the wrong way in their life for acting as they do. This does not change their stance on things though, they just get more determined, and more driven to do as they are going to do.

They often forget the very verses in their own book that tells you to treat others as you would have them treat you, or turning the other cheek, or not being judgmental. They do all the above and still commit the unforgivable sin of blasphemy as they pray to their god to better their finances, or they call his name in times of distress.

But then they come to you and want to be a leader, for you to god. They want to share the happiness this being has brought into their lives, all the while it is destroying them, from the inside out. They go to church on sunday morning to hear negative messages, only to go out in the world to be negative. You will surly go to hell if you don't change your ways. Speaking for their god instead of allowing it to be the thing that makes the judgement calls.

They do this to be rewarded in an afterlife, all the while they tear apart their relationships with people who have been there all their lives. They hurt themselves emotionally, becoming the victim that "Jesus" portrayed in the bible. I my self prefer to make the best of this life, I do not expect to see anyone else on the other side. However If there is by some chance a god, I refuse to believe that people who lash out at others in its name will be rewarded in an afterlife. I refuse to believe that people would be judged by what nation they lived in, what color of skin they had, and by the name they called this god.

If there is a god, I would have to say that this god would not harvest basic human senses and emotions. That if it were to give you a shot in an afterlife it would be because of the good that you actually did in this life, not the number of people you killed in its name.

As a mother a creator of life, I can tell you right now, I would be furious if someone destroyed one of my children, or hurt them. So think about what you are saying before you go claiming that god is all good yet will send you to hell, or wants to to kill and hurt others in its name.

I can't see any creator of anything being ok with you tearing apart its creation.
Of course I suppose there are humans who do not love their kids as much as they should but I don't know or understand how they couldn't.

There is no afterlife, and even if there is this life is the most important one because it is the life that you are in! Do good, love one anther, treat it with respect, don't hurt people. Then if there is an afterlife worry about that when you get there and it is proven to you. Until it is proven to me, and it can't be until I am dead, I am going to live for now. Not when I am dead. I love living, I am not scared of dying, but I will be damned if I am not going to live this life the best I can.

~New Years Resolutions~

Looking for peace is hard this time of year. It is even harder when it seems that everyone wants you to explain who you are and what you are with every little thing you say.
Something I never understood is if I say "I don't believe in a God?" Why some one who can't prove his existence will ask me to disprove it's existence.
Do I really have to go through every life changing event to explain why I don't believe, only to have it thrown at me, that it was just god testing my faith? The truth is that if it was god testing my faith, then it did a good job of crashing my faith completely. That should be enough said right there. I should not have to say anything more.

I love all people, no matter or differences in opinions. I love you for who you are. Sure there are going to be people I just cant get along with, however I can't honestly say I have ever formed such an intolerable uncontrollable emotion such as hate for another person.

I have yet to have a person ask me why I believe that love and understanding is the key to all of life's basic elements. Yet they will with out question, hit me from all angles and accuse me of not being able to love because I do not know the love of their god.

But you know what, I quit being a victim a long time ago, and I will be damned if I am going to start being a victim now. Somehow, someway, I am going to find that positive side of me, that remembers that everyone deserves to be loved. Somehow some way I am going to find that side of me again, that I have lost in the past few months that reminds me that being at peace with myself is more important, than being at peace with everyone else, and the deity they have chose to follow. Some how, I am going to find the place in my mind, where I remind myself that it is ok for people to have different paths than I do.

I do not care if this means I have to cut every ounce of negativity from my life in order to do so? Point blank if someone is hell bent on being miserable, and bringing me down to their level, of arguing, fussing, fighting, and making assumptions about me with out even asking, then they are not really worth my time and effort to begin with.
So here is my holiday resolution, in 2011 I am going to find that part of me, that light that so many claimed to see. I am going to stop giving into negativity, I am going to stop fighting with people because it isn't worth my time. However I am at the same point and time going to stop being walked on by other people just because I love with everything that I am. There comes a point and time when you have to say, I will not be brought down like this. I will not be made to feel insignificant to another, because they choose to focus on the negative, and I don't.
I am going to refuse to be brought down to that level again. It may mean cutting people that I love from my life, it may mean deleting a million face book accounts, but this washed out version of me, someone who has not a kind thought in her mind, simply isn't me, and I can not function being that person. It effects every area of my existence. When I notice that I am so emotionally distraught, that I can't seem to even find the time to clean because I am too busy arguing with someone over why I am right and they are wrong, well it is time for a change. I know that what ever path anyone has chosen for themselves is right for them. From here on out if they can't respect the fact that I am at peace and in perfect harmony with who I am, I will drop it. I owe no one an explanation of who I am.
Look past my lack of faith and see me as a person. Because at the end of the day I am a person, I feel, I love, and I am truly at peace with who I am, lack of faith and all. I am ok with NOT knowing and understanding everything, that doesn't mean that I am not going to take the time to learn about many things. It certainly does not mean that I am going to stop what I am learning about to discuss the things I have already learned and moved past.
For my friends, and family I only wish you peace in who you are, and I trust that you will make the right decisions for your life. You are the only one that has that control, Just as I will make the right decisions for mine. Happy Holidays wishes for peace in all things you do, good kind warm thoughts going out to you all in a very positive way!

A religious Rant

Just so you know this blog will be full of statements against religion, and god. If that offends you please read no further,  This blog is an expression of the writer only, and I am not here to fight with you about your opinions, keep that shit on your forums not on mine! You comments will be deleted if you are a spammer or a christian who does not have any hard evidence other than the bible says so or you feel it in your heart that god is real.. If your on my facebook or myspace and choose to try and start something here I will  unfriend you quickly.. Everyone else gets to say their peace I am now speaking up and saying mine.

So tired that is what I am.. So tired of the religious wars that are forced upon my door step. So tired of people thinking if they could just get me to listen I will certainly go back to my old ways of thinking..

I sit here and play those conversations over and over again in my head, how they are worried for my soul, their snipping of papers they dropped off on my door step. The allegations that I will one day without a doubt wind up suffering in hell if I don't change my mind set.

I sit here and I watch and I listen as they tell me repeatedly how wrong I am, and they cheat, they lie, they lie to themselves, pretending to be something they are not. The ones who preach the loudest are often the ones who do the most wrong, who think the most evil in the deepest darkest parts of their brains, as they tell you the bible is real, and God is real because they know it, not because they can prove it, yet they nit pick around the parts of it they will follow.

I sit back and watch as they tear apart any symbolism of love that they have in relationships between family and friends all for the sake of being holy, trying to convert someone.. just because their church tells them it is the way it should be.

I know that this does not go for all people who follow the Religion of Christianity but for the most part it does..

So tired of being labeled as weird, or some kind of incompetent piece of trash because I refuse to follow along and play the game.

So tired of being judged when the bible states that is not another mans job to judge to begin with, yet they all do.. Acting as if their shit doesn't stink, and they are all above me because of their social status in a church!

I am who I am, I do not subscribe to a belief system that bows to a God, if you love me you will accept that, if you don't then leave me alone.

The very foundation of religion destroys families, friendships, and marriage and people still run to it like a flock of sheep.

Can we truly live with out the subscription of God in our society? Truth is it has never really been done, as long as there has been documentation of people and the way they lived there has been a difference of opinion of what God is.. It has changed and evolved over time. The thought that there is not a God is a new age way of thinking and believing. But can you truly live with out it?

I do not think society will ever be able to handle not living with out imaginary friends, truth is that imaginary friends have been proven to be good for kids, and it has not been proven as of yet but maybe it is a part of our survival instinct. To believe in something higher than we are to hand our burdens over too.. I really have never had a problem with someone having that, if that is what they needed to feel good about themselves.

However I do have a problem with being told that their imaginary friend is going to come to life one day and destroy me in a fiery lake, that this being gives me free will and if I do not use free will to choose it then I will be made to suffer? That is not free will, that is terrorism!

How people can continue to worship a God that tells them to strip humanity of all of its freedoms of one's self and not serve justice to the families that need justice I do not understand. Your very commandments says Thou Shalt not kill and killers and child molesters walk and roam more freely than drug addicts. Yet you get out there and fight to take personal freedoms away from people, to be able to smoke a joint, or drink a drink, or what ever it may be, instead of fighting the justice system to hold it responsible for the murders that have blood on their hands, and they walk amongst us..

Living in a city full of pedophiles, rapist, child rapist, I see this everyday. You look at how many live with in a five mile radius of me, it is sickening. They are walking around. And you fight against the right to marry some one you love when it comes to gays, you fight for prohibition, you fight for crap. You fight against insurance paid for by the government, you pass out pamphlets about being raped is both parties fault, You disgust me!

You stand out on the corner spewing your shit, when you go home to live a double life.. The other side of you is something all together less than what you play out to be in the public image.

Then you talk to me about God, and how he forgives sin. Well no where in the book I read did it say that he forgave and forgave and forgave.. Nor did it say you had true free will, it said your god is a terrorist, and if I don't follow him he will punish  for not doing so.. That is what I got from your God and your book. So shove it..

I will not bow down before some one who thinks they are better than I am. If god wants me to bow down he needs to show me for real that he is there.. The problem is that it must be one coward of a god to hide behind the stories of a bunch of sinners who can't get their lives half way  straight to speak for him. I can't worship something that is that mean that offensive, and if that bothers you, then leave me alone! If that bothers you, then don't bother me, after all the bible says it is not for you to judge me anyways, why don't you try following some of that advice that you preach at me all damn day long for your self.. It is sad that I know your book better than you, yet you come to me with promises of a better life after this one, where is the proof? You have none so shut your trap!

Spirituality

 

















I watch people as they seek happiness. They lay their confessions down about how their religion has changed their life, and they continue to swear that if you will just take a moment to seek out what they have found, your life too will be changed. 

They act as if they can not be good parents, lay down drugs and alcohol with out having a confession of some kind, in order to prove that they are full of faith. 

But I have often found these people as good nature-d as they attempt to be, as full of faith as they claim to be, they are often lacking in faith. Faith of the highest extent, Faith in themselves. They are so busy, extending their faith to a deity, and trying to be what their religion dictates them to be, that they forget to use reasoning, of what is right and wrong. 

They lash out and hurt others, and forget to ask forgiveness from the ones they hurt, but ask it from their deity, leaving them to appear heartless, and less than caring individuals to others. 

I walk a spiritual path, with myself. Constantly seeking faith in me. Looking for the way that I can better myself, and remind the ones around me, that they are and can be as full of love as the next person. Why people have this conclusion that a God is needed to be a good person I do not know? I know I am a good person, and I am my own God, I have faith in me, and I have faith in my family and friends, and my legacy of whom are my children. 

When I fuck up I admit I have done so, when I admit it, I do not pray for forgiveness, I ask for it from the ones that I have wronged. To me that makes me a good person, because I admit that I am not perfect because I have a god, but I am perfect because I understand that I have imperfections. To me that is the start of living a life with out judgement of others, is to understand I have no business telling someone else how to live, because I am imperfect.. 

Knowing that I am imperfect makes me spiritual, seeking out the positiveness of my family, of my life, of my friends, of the world around me, and I have found more positiveness with out a God than I ever had with one.. 
So am I spiritual, yes, but my form of spirituality, is knowing that I am me, and I am happy with that, it is connecting with the world, it is gazing at the sunset, watching flowers bloom in nature. Loving those around me.. That is Spirituality for me!